These are the articles I wrote for our ROTC newspaper that got me in trouble.

First Article

Hi. I am Cadet Pete. I am one of the MSIII XOs. This summer I went to Advanced Camp. Advanced Camp was lame. Here’s one funny story from camp, however. On the day we did ITT, some cherry LT thought it would be hooah to make us all drink an entire canteen right there in front of him. Many people, like me, ended up dumping much of it out when he told us to hold it upside down over our head. But many did force the whole thing down. Unfortunately, there was no latrine time afterwards and we were all packed onto the cattle car for the long ride home. A certain cadet named Miller decided he could not take the pain anymore and utilized his empty canteen to relieve himself. This was mildly amusing. Soon After that, another cadet, Davis, squealed out in pain and said he could hold it no longer either. Davis looked like he was about to cry. I told him to go out the door, but someone else gave him an empty MRE bag to use. To this Miller said, “You F***er, you had an MRE bag and you let me piss in my canteen!” Davis used the MRE bag but he filled it too quickly and was forced to pinch it off and hold the full bag for the rest of the way home. The bag started leaking too, which made us all laugh. Ha ha, poor Davis.

Second Article

Memory Lane

Mostly for my fellow MSIVs, but you should all take a look

My name is Pete. I am one of the MSIII XOs. I have an attitude problem and it has gotten me into trouble before. Sometimes stuff just really gets on my nerves. When more than half of your weekends in a semester involve ROTC events, MSIV duties are adding up, you have to work cuz the stipend is nice but it does not even cover monthly rent, that old phrase “your classes come first” seems like a damn dirty lie as you fall further behind in your classes, and the article you wrote that you thought was witty and cynically funny is deemed inappropriate and you need to write another one, a cadet who is already in a bad mood could be tempted to write something that will get him in trouble. But folks, that’s not what we’re about. Even a dumb Irish rock learns eventually. This may be the last person you expected to hear this from, but I guess there has been too much bitching already. Since ROTC has been such a big part of my life these past three and a half years, I’m going to remind us all of how much fun we’ve had along the way. Get ready for a trip down memory lane. Remember when a cadet named Straley led a team of novices and freshmen to a stunning third place finish at Ranger Challenge despite our taking dead last in the 7-8 event? Remember the ones we called the spice girls? Remember the legendary trips to New Orleans with the drill team, Totin showing the girls how to enjoy Mardi Gras, shady hotels, “the command was, Left Face!” and the MacDonnalds meals? Remember SGM Lopez and SGM Donnalson? Rmember being class commander? Remember cleaning the disgusting Crisler Arena after a basketball game? Remember when the buzzword was “Airborne!”? Remember the first time you rappelled? Remember being OPFOR at the combined FTX and the M60? Remember the birth of the dance they called the “Robotic Ninja”? Speaking of dancing, remember the dancing LTC? Remember the parties at Theta Xi, the ones we got kicked out of and the ones we didn’t? Remember the PR initiation night? Remember MAJ Locket’s MSII class? Remember MAJ Locket’s driving? Remember when a cadet passed out while carrying the guidon during a battalion run and fell right on the “M” in the diag? Remember when a cadet passed out during the battalion award ceremony? Remember when a cadet passed out during dining in when Professor Marwil was giving a speech? Remember sitting in the back of Professor Marwil’s 266 lecture, one cadet was trying to mack on another by demonstrating his knowledge of history? Remember a skit at dining in that involved chimp costumes, a big set of plastic Cadet Grow ears, and impressions of MAJ Doyle and MSG Shackleford? Remember record breaking Rope Bridge times that have still not been broken? Remember the 770 club? Remember shooting hotdogs out of a waterballoon launcher? Remember the first time you put on class A’s?

I’m sorry, I want to go on, but at some point the S-1 will cut me off I’m sure. But I want you all to think about these things. I know we can fill a tome with the stuff I forgot to mention.


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